Protecting Conservatism from Fascism

Trump-Hitler

Dear Lord, here’s a picture of Trump and Hitler together…it must be true then that we’re on our way to fascism!

As I’m sure all of my Conservative friends are well aware, Progressives live in terror of

Bushitler

If only we Conservatives had spoken up forcefully against the possibility of a Bushitler we wouldn’t have such political division today!

our incipient fall into fascism.  We have seen this fright for every Republican who has run for or won the Presidency since Franklin Delano Roosevelt.

Given this powerful Progressive fear we must do everything in our power to convince them that we will be vigilant for even the smallest move towards fascism in the Trump Administration.  With this goal in mind I propose that we use the following items as a template to identify and oppose any practical steps towards a fascist regime.

  • The IRS, the most feared department in the U.S. government, is used to harass, demoralize and delay citizen groups seeking to exercise their Constitutional right of free political speech.
  • The Justice Department uses an unverified political opposition research document from one political candidate’s campaign to obtain a secret warrant to spy on the other candidate’s campaign during an election.
  • The FBI’s top leadership and investigators intervene in an election on the side of one candidate to discredit the other.
  • A Special Prosecutor’s office is created by bureaucrats appointed by a previous administration not to investigate a publicly defined potential crime, but rather to search for a crime (i.e., “Show me the man and I’ll find you the crime.“).  That office uses its virtually unlimited power to capriciously destroy the lives of individuals from one political party for “process crimes” (e.g., claims that they lied to the FBI or Congress) while utterly ignoring these same crimes in the other political party.
  • The nation’s spy agencies, the CIA, NSA, etc. are used to spy on not just American citizens (totally illegal), but also one political party’s campaign (anti-democratic and also totally illegal).  They also, when the wrong party wins, massively leak sensitive national intelligence information to discredit the new President.
antifa-beating

The Progressives are so anti-fascist (Antifa) that they dress in black, rampage through the streets destroying property and beat up anyone who gets in their way.  Surely no fascist impulse could enter such pure hearts!

Although there are many other sure tells that a Presidential Administration is moving towards fascism, the above five are likely the most obvious.  Please my fellow Conservatives, be eternally vigilant for the smallest sign that these crimes against freedom and democracy are beginning to occur.  And if they do, speak out immediately and loudly to reassure our Progressive fellows of our good intentions.

Now, some of the more narrow-minded than most Conservatives may complain that I’m only asking them to be on guard against the fascist menace.  Why, they will ask, not include Progressives in this warning?  I do not because by virtue of their claimed moral superiority (for they tell me so every day and in every way) and their clear hatred of fascism it is absolutely unthinkable that a Progressive Administration would even consider taking such actions, let alone actually doing so.

a-socialist-utopia

Utopia, here we come!

If we show our Progressive betters how deeply we agree with them that every Republican candidate and administration is an incipient fascist threat then I’m certain that they will become less paranoid and irrational.  Then we will finally have peace and fellowship with all our comrades as we shout in unison “I love Big Brother!”

I beg you, Conservatives, heed this warning before it’s too late!

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